Friday, December 19, 2008

Definition of "A NICE PERSON"

A nice person is neither too tall nor too short, looks clean and cheerful, has no prominent feature, makes no difficulties, is never misplaced, sits bodkin, is never foolishly affronted, and is void of affectations.
A nice person helps you well at dinner, understands you, is always gratefully received by young and old, Whig and Tory, grave and happy.
There is something in the very air of a nice person which inspires you with confidence, makes you talk, and talk without fear of malicious misrepresentation; you feel that you are reposing upon a nature which God has made kind, and created for the benefit and happiness of society. It has the effect upon the mind which soft air and a fine climate has upon the body.
A nice person is clear of little, trumpery passions, acknowledges superiority, delights in talent, shelters humility, pardons adversity, forgives deficiency, respects all men's rights, never stops the bottle, is never long and never wrong, always knows the day of the month, the name of every body at table, and never gives pain to any human being.
If any body is wanted for a party, a nice person is the first thought of; when the child is christened, when the daughter is married--all the joys of life are communicated to nice people; the hand of the dying man is always held out to a nice person.
A nice person never knocks over wine or melted butter, does not tread upon the dog's foot, or molest the family cat, eats soup without noise, laughs in the right place, and has a watchful and attentive eye.
-Syndney Smith

Thursday, December 11, 2008

Just for Laughs :)

This is fun! Enjoy!
Question 1:
How do you put a giraffe into the refrigerator?
* * *
Answer to Question 1:
Open the refrigerator, put the giraffe in, close the door.
Evaluation: This question tests whether you tend to do simple
things in
an overly complicated manner.
Question 2:
How do
you put an elephant in the refrigerator?
* * *
Answer to Question 2:
If you answered, 'Open the refrigerator, put in the elephant, close
door,' your answer was incorrect. The correct answer is - Open the
refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put the elephant in and close the
Evaluation: This question tests your ability to think through the
repercussions of your previous actions.
Question 3:
The Lion King is hosting an animal convention. All the animals are
except one. Which animal does not attend?
* * *
Answer to Question 3:
The elephant. Didn't you just put him in the refrigerator?
Evaluation: This question tests your memory.
How are you doing so far? Okay, even if you did not answer the
three questions correctly, you still have one more chance to redeem
Question 4:
There is a river you must cross, but crocodiles and alligators live
it. There is no bridge and you don't have a boat. How do you get
* * *
Answer to Question 4:
You jump in and swim across. Haven't you been listening? All the
crocodiles and alligators are attending the animal convention!
Evaluation:This tests whether you learn quickly from your mistakes.
According to Anderson Consulting - approx. 90% of the professionals
tested got all four answers wrong. On the other hand, when they tested
pre-schoolers, more than half got the answers right.
The conclusion of this testing? This test disproves that most
professionals have the brains of a four-year-old.

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Best Explanation of Rights I've ever Heard....

"My right to punch you..
ends where your nose begins."
-Bill O'Reilly

Monday, December 8, 2008

The Good Book....

In regard to this Great Book, I have but to say,
I believe the Bible is the best gift God has given to man.
All the good Savior gave to the world was communicated through this Book. But for this Book we could not know right from wrong. All things most desirable for man's welfare, here and hereafter, are to be found portrayed in it.
~Abraham Lincoln
"It is impossible to rightly govern the world
without God and the Bible."
~George Washington
"That book accounts for the supremacy of England."
~Queen Victoria
"It is impossible to enslave mentally or socially a Bible-reading people. The principles of the Bible are the groundwork of human freedom."
~Horace Greeley
"The New Testament is the very best book that ever was or ever will be known in the world."
~Charles Dickens
"In all my perplexities and distresses, the Bible has never failed to give me light and strength."
~Robert E. Lee
'The Bible is worth all other books which have ever been printed."
~Patrick Henry
"Most people are bothered by those passages of Scripture they do not understand, but the passages that bother me are those I do understand."
~Mark Twain
"Another century and there will not be a Bible on earth!"

"Voltaire expected that within fifty years of his lifetime there would not be one Bible in the world. His house is now a distribution center for Bibles in many languages."
~Corrie Ten Boom
"A thorough understanding of the Bible is better than a college education.” ~Theodore Roosevelt

Friday, December 5, 2008

So...we watched Amazing Grace recently and the story is so good I thought I'd share the best quotes with you all :)

"We're too young to realize that certain thing s are in possible....

...which is why we'll do them anyway."

-William Pitt-

"God sometimes does his work in a gentle drizzle, not storms."

-John Newton-

"Am I not a Man?
Whose soul is drawn to Heaven from the dark well that is Africa?"

"How is it that you only feel the thorns in your feet when you stop running?"
"Is that some deep metiphorical advice for me?"
"Yes, I suppose it is."

"Also Barbara and I have discovered that we're both impatient and prone to rash decisions.
But she wants to tell you about it herself."

"Though I have lost my memory, I remember two thing clearly.
I am a great sinner and Christ is a great Saviour."
"I once was blind but now I see. Did I write that?
Well, now at last it's true."

"When people speak of great men, they think of men like Napoleon - men of violence. Rarely do they think of peaceful men. But contrast the reception they will receive when they return home from their battles. Napoleon will arrive in pomp and in power, a man who's achieved the very summit of earthly ambition. And yet his dreams will be haunted by the oppressions of war. William Wilberforce, however, will return to his family, lay his head on his pillow and remember: the slave trade is no more. "
-Charles Fox-

Monday, December 1, 2008